Albion (90odd) bt Edgworth CC Tavs (82/7), 07/06/19
The year is 1471, Britain is in crisis and two Londoners are conversing on a street corner.
“Come, come, we fear the worst; all shall be well!”, says one.
The other snorts in derision and glances at his friend. “When clouds appear, wise men put on their cloaks…”
Apt for Tavs, this incidental exchange from Richard III, as those sat on the balcony glanced behind them at around 7.30pm to see the sky turning black and the distinct prospect of a heavy downpour. On with the heavy woollen cricket jumpers.
Apt too as the action on the pitch seemed a carbon copy of the season so far — willing, grafting, but coming up short and, ultimately, finding a way to drift to defeat yet again. When your first innings score is a miserly 82/7 from 20 overs, hard not to “fear the worst”.
And much like the weather, it had all begun so brightly.
Bright sunshine, covers off after hailstones earlier in the afternoon and a new captain making his debut and ringing in the changes in the batting order. Or, to be more accurate, promoting those who hadn’t had a bat in a while. Thus is the way of the Tav.
The hosts won the toss and elected to bat. The logical decision, with the sun out and barely a cloud in the sky.
Opposition Albion were given the laws of the land; two overs each, eight ball overs max, retire if 25 not out. One instruction not passed on was “play fair”. It should have been. More on that later.
An unconventional opening pair strode out to the middle; Will, who hadn’t had much of a chance to lay leather on willow this campaign, all long sleeves and helmeted like a dandy welder. Alan, who’d appeared in good nick last time out, leading from the front with a Tavs cap older than some of the opposition.
The instruction from the fledgling skipper? Take your time, lay a foundation, we can build from there.
Alan was bowled in the opening over. Decent pace, skidded on, uprooted his stumps. A duck for the veteran, an unfortunate way to go so early on.
It’s been a week of soldiers on the television, the 75th anniversary of D-Day. Appropriate therefore to quote the nation’s favourite old campaigner, Corporal Jones: “Don’t panic!” Toby in at number three, a reassuring figure with the bat save for the odd swing and a miss. His style contrasting with the gritty Will who compiled a steady six before his stumps were also uprooted.
Jason Smith in and, sadly, Jason Smith out for a duck in very much the same way as Alan and Will — perfectly illustrating the tightness of line Albion were employing. It really did prove hard to get the ball away, with a good line and length from the bowlers and decent close fielding. Toby connected from time to but invariably picked out men in the deep, boundaries proving devilishly hard to come by.
However, at this point Tavs succeeded in upping the ante, Simon joining his brother and the two of them finding the gaps, running hard and racking up the quick singles and twos. The scoreboard ticked along nicely as the light faded and clouds rolled in.
And then it all kicked off.
Controversy
Toby padded a straight one dead, the ball dropping to his feet. Striding forward, he helpfully kicked the ball back in the direction of the bowler who, as if in thanks, bowed down to pick it up. Then, with a flick of the wrist, he chucked it back down the wicket, past the flabbergasted Toby and into the wicket. Cue confusion, recrimination, half the Albion fielders appealing for a run out/stumping, half laughing and asking Toby to stand his ground. But, apparently, the bowler was adamant — he was out of his ground, I knocked his bails off, off you eff. Which Toby, eventually did. Mightily effed off he was too.
This stunning development, the least sporstmanlike thing to have happened on a cricket pitch since Ravi Ashwin’s Mankad of Jos Buttler in the IPL, stunned the Tavs on the balcony and necessitated a change-up in the batting order. Matty went in as planned but Colin, who had only just finished a stint umpiring and had been the number 11, was asked to pad up.
But Colin was on standby for some time as the first substantial partnership of the innings developed. As Matty’s unique style of bludgeon and swish advanced, Si found a new gear and clipped the shot of the innings down to the deep square leg boundary for four.
The swashbuckling pair steadied the Tavs ship then set it on course for a half-decent total, Si eventually bowled (another one! we don’t play LBW, you know!) for a very valuable 22 soon after Matty make his 25* — a truly important knock.
Into the final over, dreams of 100+ fading fast, but Jimmy and Colin saw it out and secured 82 on the board. Almost certainly not enough unless something magical happened in the field.
The fightback begins
And you know what? It almost, sort of, maybe did. Properly dark conditions at the start of the innings and in a move of potentially catastrophic hubris the new skipper brought himself on the bowl the first over.
How did the massive egotist fair? Four runs from it but also a wicket, bowling the opposition’s captain between his legs in sort of the same way Chris Cairns saw off Chris Read with that infamous slower delivery which the England keeper lost in its flight.
From the road end the new ball was given to Matty, fresh from his high-scoring knock and, it was assumed, full of confidence. Except that Matty sprayed it around like Lewis Hamilton on the podium and the slower he bowled the wilder it got. Unusually erratic, the best that can be said of his two overs is that all fielders in all positions were tested and everyone was kept in the game.
First-change, and absolutely vital to keep it tight. Who has the experience and nous to deliver in such a perilous position? Step forward, into the limelight, Mr Alan Clemence with possibly the best spell this author has ever seen him bowl. Right on the money, perfect length and pace, one wicket in his first over and two in his second. Ably supported by Rob W bowling line and length from the cow field end, Albion found their top order obliterated and four down for 30-odd.
It couldn’t happen, could it? Tavs couldn’t defend a total of just 82 against a side wearing proper whites and who’d bowled and fielded like tigers? A first win of the campaign wasn’t really on the cards, was it?
In a word, no.
A narked-off Toby bowled speedily and accurately but was hit for his first ever six in Tavs colours. Admittedly his very next ball removed the batsman’s off-stump bail, but in his second over he pulled a thigh muscle and was hobbling around thereafter.
Twilight
And though the Tavs continued to field with as much commitment and desire as a new captain could want, and although the likes of Colin, Simon and Will (brought on too late) bowled tightly and kept the run rate down, Albion formed their first meaningful partnership and all of a sudden needed just 12 off five overs.
Which they got. No great surprises there, though Tavs continued to battle it out until it was beyond hope.
Here’s the thing: there’s no lack of spirit, of commitment, of a will to win. Everyone supported everyone out there, no-one shirked and it was more of a game that it had any right to be.
But. We. Haven’t. Got. The. Runs. So. Far. This. Year.
At least, not yet. The game finished in bucolic, dappled sunshine, the Tavs’ confidence just that little more bruised than before. No sign of rain now.
We know that first win is just around the corner.
It’s always darkest before the dawn.
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Highlight of the match: Rob’s keeping goes from strength to strength. Al bowled superbly but without Matty’s 25* we really would have been up a certain creek without a certain paddle.
Lowlight: At one point Albion belted a ball towards the long off boundary. Heading for six, Rob W was fielding in the deep. He ran in to catch it, too hard too fast, and it sailed harmlessly over his head for a maximum. For shame.
And someone (Toby?) has written CHEATING in the scorebook next to Toby’s dismissal. Hard not to somewhat agree.
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Best bowling: Al, take a bow.
Best batting (must retire on 25): Matty you beauty.
